Single or not to be single

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A Little over 19 months Ago me and my kids dad decided to go are separate ways after 25.5 yeas together, it was not a easy decision at all and i wont go into any details as my son reads this blog and that’s not fair,  we moved out in Jan 11 after deciding in the previous Nov..  

i did meet with a chap who i met of twitter and that was a mix of Nice and only crap what have i done,.  he was nice to start with but i was clearly not ready for a full on relationship just after a long term one had just ended, it was a Rebound relationship i can see it was now, but he was so the wrong person,  and i was not ready at all, stuck stuck in my old ways as if i  was still with kids dad,  

i have not seen anyone since End July last year.. there is no man in my life except my Kids and my dad,  But i don’t know what to do..  The Ex has clearly moved on now after he had a year out he as a GF, Son and a Dog ready made new family, which happens when your own falls apart.

I don’t know what to do myself..  Most of the time i am happy that it’s just me and the boys, but other times i wish there was someone special.. and i mean special as he would have to take on me and my boys on which one has special needs and may never leave my side.. Then again i feel there is No time to have a man in my life as they are complex creatures (not all are but most) you have the guys who like to drink (I don’t drink) you have the guys who like sex (and I am not going to say i don’t like it  but since my hysterectomy all urges have gone,) you have the men who like their food, (not a great cook but better than some) you have the men who don’t like their Veg (their hard to cook for) and you have the men who treat you as a MUM (that was the kids dad) and you have the Men who Use you and use other woman too (that was the rebound)

All the above have kind of put me off but also i am so so scared of getting hurt again, but its not just me its the kids too.  

I don’t even know if i have a type i like, 

I agree i need to dig all the past out and throw it away, but its not easy just so scoop your brain out and de-clutter the stuff you don’t want and start again.  

As for dating sites it seems half the people on there are actually married anyway and hiding it all..

 

Just wish i knew what to do..  

 

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By Debbie

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